Interpersonal conflicts

Communicating with other people means that we have to understand each other. Some people we reach understanding with easily and instantly, some people we have to argue with to reach an agreement.

We can argue and compromise quickly, or we can debate for hours and get not even remotely close to understanding. To better understand what has gone wrong, we need to point out two of numerous factors of a debate, the one being you and the other your interlocutor.

On one hand there is your character. How do you behave when in conflict? Do you calmly try to explain your point or do you seek to impose your opinion to your opponent by yelling at him and by waving your fists? What do you think, which way would be better, a diplomatic one or one by force?

We would say that the peaceful option might be the best one most of the time. You should not jump up from your seat and start heatedly show your point. In that case the person in front of you may object you just because he didn’t like your offensive tone and not because he would never agree with you.

If that person is aggressive, he might just hit you without saying anything. In any case, it is most likely that you won’t understand each other at all and plus you will get nervous for nothing at the very least. So, the best option to compromise may be just to sit down and talk. Good arguments are usually enough to reach understanding, but you need to be ready to meet halfway with your interlocutor.

The other factor of a debate is your opponent, so to speak. He may be reasonable, compliant or persistent, but he also may be completely unaccommodating. That intractability may be a result of various causes. Perhaps, your “opponent” thinks that it would be beneath his dignity to succumb to you. Or he is, excuse me for rudeness, just a dumb person who doesn’t understand and doesn’t even want to understand you.

In this case the first thing to do, as already has been mentioned in “People who are impudent”, is to ask yourself whether you really need to convince the given person or not. What does that person mean for you? Is he close to you or is he just a random passer?

We honestly can’t give you any advice on what to do to convince such people as we don’t know for sure by ourselves. People are different, and some may be convinced after a talk with friends or relatives, but there are for certain such people who don’t want to understand because they don’t get your point or the fact that they are mistaken in the first place.

In addition, another important thing is to not keep feelings deep inside. They have an ability to be stacked until there is not enough space for them. Then they just burst out in many different ways which can be either relatively harmless or exceedingly destructive. Resolve issues when they appear and not when you can’t contain stress of days or months, as you basically won’t be able to solve anything.

As a conclusion, here is a thing that we have mentioned numerous times in our topics and a thing you may have heard many times in your life: analyze, think, make conclusions, become a better person. Let your experience be a guide for you, not such a thing bitterness of which pulls you into abyss.